Dislclaimer: I know what you're thinking. I don't own Dragon Ball. You know what? You're absolutely correct!

Note: Based from an episode of  "The Simpsons", I will attempt to cram the entire thirty minutes into one five page fanfic. Good luck to me. Both Trunks and Goten are in middle school. This was originally for Ice Queen's humor contest but since she's not having it yet, it's now a regular old fanfic.

The Substitutes

09:30, Monday Morning.

"Trunks? Are you absolutely, positively sure this plan is going to work?"

"Of course I am, Goten! Now just go and talk to your teacher. I'll speak to the principal."

"Okay... I'll trust you on this."

Both boys split up in the hallway, Goten to his classroom and Trunks to the main office. Goten put on his best sad face and walked up to the teacher's desk.

"Habura-sensei," he said, "I'm sorry to tell you this but Takenada-sensei has been saying bad things about you."

She looked up over the tops of her glasses. "What do you mean, Goten?"

"He said something like 'That Ami can't do anything right! She's always teaching classes wrong and screwing up the children.' "

She stared hard at him. "Are you telling the truth?"

"Hai, Habura-sensei." He nodded. "I really like you and I wanted you to know about Takenada-sensei's horrible comments." As if on cue, the P.A. system comes on. It's, of course, the principal's voice.

"That stupid Ami! She ought to be fired and never allowed to teach in this country again! When I get my hands on her-!"

Habura-sensei jumped to her feet in rage. "That's it, I can't take it anymore! I'm going on strike and I'm taking all of the other teachers with me!"

Goten barely kept the joy from his face. "Oh really? Sorry to hear that." His teacher didn't respond but marches from the classroom and across the hall. There's some feedback from the P.A. and her voices is heard.

"All teachers hear this! We're going on strike! I repeat, we're going on strike!"

Goten ran out into the hallway just in time to see every single classroom door open and happy teachers run down the hallway towards the parking lot. Not two minutes later, all of the kids follow.

"We're free! Thank kami!"

Goten looked at his best-friend with tears in his eyes. "Trunks, I'll never doubt you again. This is the happiest day of my life."

Trunks was equally tearful. "I know Goten! Isn't it wonderful?"

They both run down the hallway and out the door trying to see what they could do on a weekday morning.

 

05:00, Monday Evening

"Traffic was backed up everywhere as thousands of school children were dismissed from school early today. They skipped rope in the middle of the streets, drew chalk drawings, and other kid things. It seems that when the teachers went on strike at Orange Star Elementary it started off a chain of events that sent teachers on strike at every single public school in the city. Now everyone is resorted to walking to work because those children will not get out of the way and let the autos pass."

"Did this really happen today?" Bulma was in shock as she listened to the reporter on the news. This was a surprising event.

"Hai, Kaasan," Trunks said. "I don't know how long we'll be out but I hope it's a long, long time!"

"Yeah!" Goten jumped up and down with excitement. "This is *so* cool!"

"No it isn't," Bulma frowned. "My son is becoming an idiot because the damn teachers went on strike."

"But Bulma-san," Goten said with an innocent expression, "Trunks was already an idiot."

"Baka!"

"Why are you worrying about it?" Vegeta asked. "We never had to go to school on Vegeta-sei. Look at how I turned out."

Bulma stood, her mind made up. "That's it. We're getting you some teachers." She marched out of the room to use the phone. Trunks waited until she was out of earshot before sticking his tongue out at his father.

"Kami Papa! Why did you have to say that to her? Now I'm gonna have to learn again!"

Vegeta's face darkened at his action. "I wouldn't recommend that you do that anymore. You might be missing a tongue and I'm sure you won't like that." Trunks, now very subdued, went to go spar outside and Goten followed.

 

08:30, Tuesday Morning.

The class was full of kids (Bulma made TONS of calls last night) but there was no teacher. This was gym and some of the students entertained themselves by playing basketball or shooting dice with their lunch money. Suddenly a whistle blowed and everyone looks over to where it came from. To their surprise (and Trunks' horror) there stood Vegeta with a baseball cap on his head and a silver whistle on a chain around his neck.

"All right you maggots! Fall in line!"

"Papa! What the hell are you doing here?" Trunks whispered this to him so that no one besides Goten would find out that he was his father.

"Trunks, SON!" Vegeta shouted this at the top of his voice while smirking. "You will get in line with the rest of these pathetic ningen so that I will be able to start this class. RIGHT NOW!" He said this last part right in his face and spit flew everywhere. Trunks slowly joined the rest of the class with a sour expression on his face.

"My name is Vegeta and I'm your sub for today. Pair up! You will now proceed to do one-hundred situps. Then switch with your partner." He blew the whistle. "Do it NOW!"

"Vegeta-san?" A small sixth grader said. "What if you can't do a hundred?"

"Well then, little girl," he bent down to her level with a smile on his face. When he was an inch away his face transformed into a fierce frown. "You'll just be here forever until you finish because I DON'T LIKE SISSIES! Are you understanding me?"

She nodded with tears running down her cheeks.

"Good. NOW GET TO IT!"

Goten looked at Trunks as he began his turn. "This is going to be a *long* week."

He nodded. "I know."

 

1:30, Tuesday Afternoon.

Both Trunks and Goten had woodshop after lunch. In fact, they had most of their classes together except for the ones that were for specific grade levels. When they arrived Goku was there waiting for them.

"Oh hi guys!" He grinned. "Welcome to my class."

Both kids' eyes just about popped out of their heads. "TOUSAN?!" "GOKU-SAN?!"

"Hai, that's right. I will be your teacher until the strike ends." The rest of the students filed in and took their seats. "My name is Son Goku. I'm Goten's father. Today we will build bird houses and all of the pieces you need are already out. All you need to do it glue it together and paint it. Goten, how about you pass out the instructions to the class?" He smiled at him. "That's my good little boy."

"That's my good boy," Trunks mocked loudly. The entire class burst into giggles.

"Don't start Trunks," he warned. "At least my tousan wasn't acting like a saiya-jin drill sergeant."

"Um, Tousan!" Goten squeaked out loudly about half-way through class.

"Hai, my little angel?"

"I think my hands are glued to the table!" He was turning red in the face trying to pry them up. The entire class began to laugh at him again.

"Kami that's got to be some tough glue!" Trunks commented. "I mean, you're a demi-saiya-jin."

"I'm quite aware of what I am, thank you." He growled at him.

"It that was me," he went on, "I would be able to unstick myself from the glue. You know?"

Goku had finally pulled Goten free from the table but unfortunately part of the wood came with him. He picked up his miserable son and ran scalding hot water over his hands to loosen the glue. Ten minutes of it and the wood came free. Poor Goten was blushing and the entire class was laughing louder.

"Do you want some tea with your wood?" Trunks snickered. "Or are you fine?"

Goten didn't say anything but discreetly unscrewed the cap of the glue and poured a big glob of it into his "best-friend's" chair. Then he walked around the table to stand in front of him. "Hey Trunks, why not have a seat?" He then pushed him backwards into his chair.

Trunks looked seriously confused. "Why did you do that?" Then as he stood again he found out why. The chair was firmly stuck to his butt. He pulled and pulled but he was sort of tearing the fabric of his clothing. Then the bell rang and the class stampeded out of the room leaving unfinished projects at their desks with their names on it.

"Are you going to stay here the rest of your life or are you going home Trunks?" Goten smirked widely and ran out of the room. Trunks tried to chase him but found that the chair was awkward. Groaning loudly, he stepped out of his pants and took off after his friend in his underwear.

"Come back you little baka! Let me hurt you!" Everyone burst into laughter as he passed at his teddy bear boxers Bulma bought him for Christmas.

 

08:45 Wednesday Morning.

They were once again back in Vegeta's Gym Class of Doom. (thunder booms) This time they had swimming. All of the kids splashed each other in the pool until their teacher emerged from the dressing room in a leopard print thong. Trunks sort of shrieked and covered his eyes.

"Dude," Goten said with his eyes closed. "what's wrong with your tousan? Did he lose his mind?"

"Papa put something on! Please!"

"What's wrong? Are you afraid that I look better than you do in a swimsuit?"

"That's not it. I'm afraid that my poor little mind will be scarred for life by seeing your ass."

He blew his whistle. "Trunks Briefs! You have to do ten laps of the backstroke for attemping to insult me." Goten laughed at his misfortune. "Son Goten! You do ten laps of the front crawl for giggling. Now, does anyone else want to join them?"

Silence so profound you can hear crickets chirping.

"Alright then. The rest of you get to tread water for five minutes seeing as you didn't answer me when I asked a question."

"Vegeta-san," the same little sixth grade girl began, "what if you don't know how to tread water?"

"Then I guess that you drown. Any more questions?"

All of the kids except Trunks and Goten (who are on their third lap by now) shake their heads no.

"Good."

***

Now Vegeta gave them play time in the pool being the *cough* nice person that he is. Goten dove underneath the water and stole Trunks' shorts and jumped out of the pool while waving them high above his head.

"Ha! Got your trunks Trunks!"

Trunks is blushing while trying to cover all of his vital areas from the rest of the class. "Give 'em back Goten!"

Vegeta blew his whistle. "Trunks, out of the water."

"But Papa!" He protested. "I'm naked and there's girls around!"

"I'm sure the girls have seen naked boys before. If they haven't then they're about to find out now how one looks. Get. Out. Of. The. Water. NOW!"

"I'm going to murder you, Goten." Trunks growled. "Just wait."

"Goten, because you were doing something stupid to the royal prince you get to match him." Vegeta continued.

"What do you mean?"

"Give me the suit."

His eyes widened. "IIE! I can't!"

Vegeta stood from his bench and approached the boy slowly. "Give me the damn suit now."

"Iie, Vegeta-ojisan." Suddenly Vegeta lunged at Goten and they both splashed into the pool. After a few minutes below the surface with bubbles rising quickly to the top, both emerge from the water. Goten out of breath and laughing at how fun that was and Vegeta holding his swim trunks high in the air like a flag.

"Now you know what you boys get to do?" he asked.

"Iie, what Papa?"

"Stand on the deck butt naked for the rest of the class. Lucky for you I'm feeling kind today so I'm going to allow you to keep your backs turned. GO!"

"Aw geez," Trunks complained as he and his friend climbed up out of the water. "This is all your fault, Goten."

"No it isn't!"

"Papa would have never made us do this if you haven't snatched my trunks."

"Trunks, he probably would have came up with something humiliating eventually anyway."

"You know what? You're right."

 

The teachers eventually saw the light and came back to school ending Trunks and Goten's school nightmares. No chibis were harmed in the making of this fanfic but maybe a few Chaozu's were. (This last paragraph also makes it six pages.)

~Owari~