Valentine's Day Disaster

Valentine’s Day Disaster

A 2 day late Valentine’s Day fic starring:

Bulma & Vegeta!

Note on why it’s late: I know I should have written it either Sunday or Monday (because I didn’t go to school anyway), but the thought didn’t come to me until Tuesday and I had too much homework so here it is! Also, it kind of goes with A Week in the Life of Vegeta that I WILL finish soon. I’m already on day three! J

Every thought that’s Vegeta’s will be in italics.

I awoke to a smiling Bulma leaning over me. I was really startled. Why was the woman doing that?

"Ve~ge~ta." She said in a playful voice.

"Wha~at." I decide to play along.

"Do you know what day it is?"

"Uh, the day you start cooking lessons?" I ask hopefully.

All I got for that was a slap across my face. "No you baka! It’s a holiday!"

"Uh, Christmas?"

"It’s February!" She waited a little while longer until she saw that Vegeta truly didn’t know what the day was. "It’s St. Valentine’s Day!"

"What’s that?"

"You don’t know what Valentine’s Day is?" She asked amazed.

"Why would I? We never had the holiday on Vegeta-sei."

"Hmmm. Well anyway, it’s when all of the people in love buy presents for each other and show how much they care. Friends can celebrate this too."

"Oh so it’s a Kakarott holiday." I call every holiday that’s stupid a Kakarott holiday.

"No it’s NOT stupid!" How did she know about that?

"Why did you just call your friend stupid?"

"Oops. Hey! You’re doing this on purpose to get me off topic. Well, it’s not going to work vegetable head." Damn.

"Why are you bothering me with this? Vegeta, crown prince…" I started to ask out loud, but Bulma interrupted me. I have no idea why. Common folk can’t be told too many times about who their superiors are.

"Think about what I said before." She got up and left the room.

Think about what she said before, think about…. Oh Kami! She wants me to go and get her something! I guess I will. This shouldn’t be too hard.

I get up and go get dressed. I can’t wear my workout outfit today if I’m going in public. Last time I did that, I had attracted a good size group of loyal followers. Guess I will wear some jeans and a tee shirt. These will do. I go downstairs to get some food, well something that vaguely resembles food.

"Vegeta, have you ever heard the word iron? You look like you got hit by a car! Take them off." I look at her then start to striptease. "So I can get the wrinkles out." She added with a sigh. I sighed too. What does a saiyan have to do around here to get some love?

After she attacked my clothes, she attacked the poor food. What did it ever do to her? The least she could do was prepare it well to thank it for dying so that we could eat. Actually, I wouldn’t have cared less if it was still alive when I broke its neck. The food chain is, after all, unbreakable.

When I finished, she gave me a look. "I hope what I said upstairs will educate you because you don’t want me around if you don’t do anything." I’m sure I don’t. Trunks then decides to emerge from his room, when he came down, he was surprised that his parents weren’t yelling at each other.

I soon left after that for the stores. I first stopped at the First Street Flower Shop and went in. I looked around shocked. Wasn’t a flower shop supposed to have flowers?

"We sold out at about 6am. You really should have gotten here earlier."

I growl. Great now I’m going on a present hunt. Next I stop at the Chocolate Works. Nope. Nothing there either. Same reason too. They had sold out earlier. When I stopped at another flower store the employees there actually laughed and said I was stupid for waiting till the day to go get something. One of them made a surprise visit to the next dimension. If I want some love tonight, I’m gonna have to control my temper.

I decide to stop by the mall. As soon as I entered, I instantly regretted it. There were literally HUNDREDS of men in there! Oh, why did the mall have to have a one day only sale today? After asking one human what the deal was I found out that these men were all the cheap ones, the forgetful ones. I look around for something, but in every store, it looked as if WWIII had broken out. They were fighting over little things; makeup, jewelry, candy, even FAKE flowers. I stop by JC Penny’s to get some lingerie or something. They were cleaned out too. As was Sears, Hudson’s, and a numerous other stores. Finally I go to a drug store. There’s no candy or anything in here either. Finally I just grab something random and go home. Don’t worry, I did pay for it.

When I returned, Bulma was pretty happy. (I had wrapped it before I gave it to her) She thought it was some jewelry, but as she opened her smile turned upside down. I swear I saw flames in her eyes and if looks could kill I would have been dead at least five times over.

"HOW DARE YOU COME BACK WITH THIS?!! YOU COULD HAVE DONE BETTER!"

"It’s the thought that counts, right? I was thinking of you as I bought it!" I said meekly, a little intimidated by her fury. She throws my 99-cent box of spearmint Tic Tacs back at me along with other things. Dishes, pots & pans, chairs, even a coffee table came at my head.

"GET YOUR ASS OUT NOW! I DO NOT WANT TO SEE YOU FOR A LONG, LONG WHILE! UNLESS YOU COME BACK WITH SOMETHING GOOD!"

I run. I can’t believe this! I go get in the madness at the mall, get laughed at, and waste most of my day to get her something and she throws me out! The nerve!

I fly away and just to add to my misery, it starts to rain!

"ACHOO!" I sneeze. I sniff also. Great! I now have a cold! I land and realize where I am. Kakarott’s house! Wonderful! Sarcasm seems to be my forte today. I decide to walk to his house. I knock on his door and his mate opens it.

"Hello- Ah! What are you doing here?"

I start to answer and before I could finish I sneeze.

"Oh you poor thing. Come in, come in!" I follow her into the living room and she sits me down on the couch. Kakarott’s oldest brat, Gohan comes into the room. He looks at me in shock and believe me, I am SO tired of this look! The frustration builds until finally I can’t take it anymore, I start to cry.

"Bulma (sniff) threw me out (sniff) because I didn’t get her anything good today! (sniff) I didn’t even know what today was until this morning!" I bury my face in my hands.

Kakarott’s whole family is gathered around me now. "Vegeta, what did you get her?" Kakarott himself asked.

I mumbled. "What did you say Vegeta-san? We can’t hear you!" Goten said loudly.

I mumbled again. "Huh?" ChiChi asked.

"I SAID THAT I GOT HER A DAMN BOX OF TIC TACS!"

"WHAT?" they all asked together. "No wonder she threw you out on your butt! Tic Tacs? Please!"

"Even I got ChiChi something better than that!" Kakarott said as he went and got it. He brought out a huge box of chocolates, a dozen roses, and a musical card. I shake in rage and then everything became a blur.

 

Jeez! They didn’t have to throw me out! It’s not my fault that somehow Kakarott’s body became wedged into a rather large hole through their front door. He shouldn’t have annoyed me!

I go home since I have no other place to go. As I went up to the room my wife and I share she was looking rather happy.

"You’re soooo nice, Veggie-chan!" Huh? "I love you soooo much!"

"What are you talking about, woman?"

"This." She points out a lot of presents that were on the nightstand. "You’re getting a good reward for that." As she turns out the lights I noticed that the flowers look just like the ones Kakarott had. Damn. Now I owe him one.

THE END