Disclaimer: Don't own 'em. Never did, never will. Akira Toriyama-san does.

Note #1: The idea of Piccolo's world domination is not my idea. It's Akira-san's. I only expand on it and look at it from another angle.

Note #2: I'm sorry if I offended anyone with Piccolo being gay and with me talking about the Prez.

{ } = author inserts.

Once Upon a Dragon Ball: Section 2, Episode 12

Last time on Once Upon a Dragon Ball:

-Bra's head of the Satan City Circle

-Piccolo's new goal is world domination... again.

-Goku's fed up with President Clinton (aren't we all)

-Bulma almost burned the Capsule Corp. down

-Vegeta and Piccolo broke up

(Scene opens in England in a large home. Queen Elizabeth is in her room, sitting at a dressing table.)

(The window opens and Goku climbs in.)

Goku: Elizabeth-sama, I have a message for you. (She looks up, startled.)

Elizabeth: Oh! (She turns around.) Goku, it's only you! Next time though, could you please knock first? (Seeing Goku look confused {When isn't he?} she added something.) Knock on the door.

Goku: Gomen. President Clinton has sent you a personal letter. (He walks over to her and gives her the envelope.)

Elizabeth: Oh good! I was getting bored.

Goku: ::sweatdropping:: What do you see in him anyway? He's married for kami's sake! What makes you think he won't cheat on you too?

Elizabeth: WHAT?! We were only going to the amusement park! He's just my friend! We have fun, that's all. Jeez, what would I want with him in the first place?

Goku: I am soooo sorry! I didn't mean to offend you!

Elizabeth: Apology accepted. (She went back to brushing her hair. Goku just stood there.) You can leave now.

Goku: (blinking) Oh yeah. Sorry. (He goes over to the window and flies away.)

(Scene opens at the Capsule Corp. kitchen, where Bulma is trying to kill everyone in the building, again.)

Bulma: (Actually reading a cookbook!) Wow! You use chocolate to make brownies! {Don't ask what she used before to get them brown. It's best not to think about it.} This is soooo informative!

(Vegeta comes into the room and goes straight to the fridge. He does a double-take as he realizes that Bulma has a cooking aide!)

Vegeta: (Rushing over and putting a hand to Bulma's forehead) Hmmm, it's not hot.

Bulma: (confused) What are you doing?

Vegeta: Checking for a temperature.

Bulma: Ha, ha. You're reeeallly funny, midget-man. Trying for two weeks?

Vegeta: (getting a panicked look on his face) You're the best cook in the world! I love you! You know that right? (He gets down onto one knee on her right side. {::gasp::}) Bulma, you mean the world to me, I want you to know that I will always be here for you no matter what I do or what I say.

Bulma: (crying) Oh Vegeta! Hearing you say those words are a dream come true! I knew marrying you and having you as our childrens' father was a good idea! (she flung her arms around him and squeezed with all of her might.)

Vegeta: (picking her up into his arms) Shhh, don't cry. (he starts up the stairs thinking to himself:) I knew this would work wonders! Human woman are soooo soft.

(Scene opens at our nations capital)

Piccolo: (hiding in the shadows) It's all set. I will seize this nations capital with practically no force at all! (turning to a man besides him) Johnson! Did you plant the forged will?

Johnson: Yes sir!

Piccolo: Hayes! Did you set up the "accidents"?

Hayes: Of course, sir! Nothing to worry about sir!

Piccolo: Good. Very good. Everything is falling into place nicely.

About 2 hours later...

(Mr. President is walking down the hallway to the Oval Office with two senators, one on each side.)

Bill: Now gentleman, we want peace with Russia. They have an extremely powerful army. I- (He was cut short as the each of the senators are killed. The one on the right: bullet to the brain. The one on the left: small ki blast.) Aw crap.

Piccolo: (shaking his head in disbelief) Damn! Can't you bakas do anything right?

Stupid henchman #1: I don't see you doing anything!

(Piccolo raised his hand and blasted him to bits.)

Piccolo: You're wrong. I just did something now. Anyone else got somethin' to say?

(His men shake their heads, trembling.)

Piccolo: Good. (He remembers about what happened just a couple of minutes before.) Shit! I guess I'm gonna have to do it myself. (He walks right up to the Oval Office, where Clinton had gone into, and knocked.)

Bill: All right! I'm coming! (He opens the door.) Oh, hello.

Piccolo: (low) Just step back into the room, slowly.

Bill: What?!

Piccolo: (losing his temper) Just DO IT!

(Bill hurries to comply.)

Bill: I have a wife and daughter! Please don't hurt me!

Piccolo: Youre about to lose you position anyway. You served your two terms and therfore you usefulness has come to an end. And anyway, your daughter is all grown up and you don't like your wife! You cheated on her with-

Bill: Don't say it!

Piccolo: Monica Lewinsky.

Bill: Ugh. I told you don't say it! That bitch has given me a lot of trouble, you know.

Piccolo: I'm not here to chit chat. I'm here to- (looks around the room and blows up each sercurity camera with a ki blast.) kill you.

Bill: (after seeing what he did) Damn! Uh, why would you want to do that?

Piccolo: It's the first step to fulfill my dream of

(insert dramatic music)

world domination. Mwhahahaha-

Bill: Ow! You're hurting my ears!

Piccolo: (slapping him) DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT ever interrupt my evil villian laugh! Do it again and I'll torture you before I kill you.

Bill: (weakly) Sorry...

Piccolo: Back to the subject. Mwhahahahaha-

Bill: (under breath) Stupid idiot.

Piccolo: (enhanced hearing still heard it) Okay buddy, you asked for it! (runs over to a public annoucement system) All hear this! All here this! Mr. Bill Clinton is at it again with Ms. Monica Lewinsky right here in his office! Tickets are only $5.00! I repeat, Clinton is at it agiain in his office and tickets are only $5.00. Thank you!

Bill: Oh god!

(There is a thudering sound. Someone in the hallway shouts out, "STAMPEDE!", but it's only just about every person present in the White House, with the secret service agents in the lead, all running towards the Oval Office...)

Bill: Aw man! (he runs to the window, opens it, and jumps. Piccolo also runs over to it and watches at his body hits the spires on top of the fence below, impaling him upon impact.)

Piccolo: (looking away) Ooh! That's got to hurt... (brightening) But hey! At least he did my work for me! (he also jumps out of the windo, but he flies away.)

2 days later...

(Scene opens in a park. There are men in Armani suits everywhere, with the occasional child or woman. Bra is also there along with Trunks, Pan, Vegeta, and Bulma. A banner hung between two trees read: Satan City Circle Annual Bar-b-que. All are welcome! (at your own risk).)

Head clan member of the East Capital: ...and that is the most effective way to eliminate a government official.

Head clan member of the North Capital: That's good! Thanks for the tip.

H.C.M. of the E.C.: No problem.

(Bra approaches a raised stage and grabs a mike.)

Bra: Welcome everyone! I hope you're having fun! (All she got was some scattered mumbling. She pulls out an Uzi.) I said: I HOPE YOU'RE HAVING FUN!

Crowd: We sure are Bra-sama, head clan member of the Central Capital and leader of the best group in the world, the Satan City Circle!

Bra: (smiling) I thought so. (She turns to see her gaping guests.) See? All they need is a little motivation. (She spots someone and heads over to them.)

Bulma: (whispering to Vegeta) Remind me to NEVER cross paths with her when she's angry.

Vegeta: You bet I will!

What is to become of Piccolo? Will I ever have an episode with Yamcha, Tien, and Choutzu in it? Do you like it so far? Stay tuned to the next exciting episode of Once Upon a Dragon Ball!