Warning: An itty, bitty 'lil shojo ai warning but it's not at all that bad.
Duo Maxwell's Island: Episode 6
A few days later, Relena was filing her nails on the beach when the radio next to her on the blanket, recently messed with by Heero Yuy himself, started to crackle with static. Relena jumped, startled, and stared at it.
"What the..?" She said softly as she cocked her head in confusion. Then the burst of sound was heard again. Fiddling with a few dials, she picked up the communication and pushed the button on the side.
"Uh, this is Relena Peacecraft, the Queen of the World. May I ask who's calling?" She released the button and waited.
The voice came in a bit clearer and she strained to hear.
"Hai, this is Hope. We're over the Pacific Ocean where is your location?"
"Uh, I think we're by Hawaii but I could be wrong. We're stranded with no way home! Can you please help us?!"
"My crew and I will search the area," the woman said. "It will take a couple of hours. Be patient." And then the signal was disconnected.
Relena grinned and got to her feet. "HEEEEROOO~OOOOO!"
Heero's head jerked up from where he had pushed Duo into the ocean. "Damn. I can't let her find me!" He jumped in after his koi and Wufei and Quatre both raised eyebrows.
She crashed through the jungle and right up to the water's edge. "Guess what? I got somebody on that communicator thingy!"
"Nani onna?" then Wufei snorted. "If Heero couldn't I doubt that you could."
Then both Heero and Duo both popped up from the water, out of breath.
"What's going on?" the braided one asked.
"Relena says that she's gotten someone on Heero's communicator," Quatre told him. "I don't know if it's true."
"I can prove it!" she cried as she ran back to her spot to retrieve it.
"Baka," Heero muttered.
Five minutes later the annoying princess returned. She sat down by the shore, pressing random buttons, and actually got the woman back.
"Hello?" she said loudly. "Are you there?"
"Hai? Ms. Peacecra-- er Peacecraft? Is this you?"
Quatre's eyes widened so much they took up most of his face. "Oh wow!"
Duo joined in his awe. "She's actually good for something!" Then his grin turned into a suspicious frown. "Isn't that a bad omen? Like 'Relena's useful, the apocalypse is coming'?"
While the boy stood in the shallow water, musing, Heero walked up to her and snatched the device from her lax grip. "Give me that!"
"Konichi-wa," Heero said. "Are you coming to rescue us?"
"Sure!" the woman replied cheerfully. "Marie Lee at your service! It's a good thing we were flying in the area too. I mean--"
Heero cut her off in mid-sentence. "How long will it take you to get here?"
"Like I told the girl, it should only take a few hours. We have to actually find you guys first. If *you* could tell me, it would be a big help..."
"Mission Accepted[1]," Heero intoned.
The rest all sweatdropped.
"We are an hour and a half away from the island of Maui." He continued without paying a bit of attention to the others.
"Great!" Marie said cheerfully. "We'll be there in a little bit. Ja!"
"Nice onna," Wufei said sarcastically. "Is she related to you somehow Maxwell?"
"Shut up, *Wuffie-chan*," Duo grinned.
"KISAMA!"
"Quiet!" Heero shouted. When the Wufei's outrage had calmed, he continued. "Now, we have a chance to leave this island and I don't want anyone messing it up."
Then Dorothy came back with Trowa trailing behind her. It was decided from the second day that if anyone could hunt prey it would be Freaky Eyebrow Girl. Who accompanied her was roated. The pair carried several fish which they set on the sand before the group.
"What did we miss?" Trowa asked in that quiet voice of his. When Quatre spotted him, his blue eyes just lit up.
"Tro-chan!" he squealed as he ran to his koi. Dorothy stuck out a hand that hit him directly in the center of the forehead, halting him.
"Whoa!" she smirked. "Down boy!"
Trowa shot her a look that could make even Duo shut up and she glared right back. Quatre's eyes teared up instantly and he started to sniffle.
"Oh geez!" Duo moaned. "Here it comes!"
"Th-th-that was mean!" the little blond boy choked out. "I was just happy to see my Tro-chan!" Then the floodgates opened and the water poured out.
Trowa was at his side almost immediately, trying to calm him. "It's okay Little One. Do not listen to the Catalonia woman..."
Quatre just clung to his koibito as if he were scared he was going to leave him and sobbed his litle heart out.
Relena snorted at the pathetic scene while Duo frowned in the other blond's direction.
"Why'd ya go and do that? You know that he's sensitive!"
"Sad is more like it," Dorothy mentioned as she turned away. "I don't know how you pilots put up with it."
"That's enough onna!" Wufei snapped. "You will not talk that way about one of my comrades again."
"He's right. Now will you people please let me continue?!" Heero shouted at the end of his patience. When no one spoke he almost smiled. "That's better. Now, we have to gather all of our supplies and things so that when Ms. Lee comes, we'll be all ready to go. NOW MOVE YOUR ASSES!!"
"Yes sir!" Duo mock saluted as he patted his koi on the butt and ran off laughing. Heero turned an unnatural shade of red as the others teased him.
The rest of the time was spent packing up their gear. Everything from Relena's entire collection to Heero's meager possessions was brought to the most clear part of the small island.
"Now all we do is wait," Quatre sighed.
And wait they did.
Eventually one hour passed, then two. And finally Relena let out a shriek that caused all of the tropic birds to take wing.
"NANI?!" Duo screamed as he jumped from his place on Heero's lap.
"I left my purse. I need to go and get it."
"Baka onna," Wufei muttered.
"I'll go with you," Dorothy said quickly.
"Don't do anything I wouldn't!" Duo called after them.
"Duo," Trowa began, "that's basically telling them that they can do whatever they want."
His grin turned maniacal. "I know."
***
Dorothy whistled somewhat innocently as they walked through the jungle.
"So," she began casually, "did you really need to get your purse?"
"Hai," she replied. "Why do you ask?"
Dorothy snatched her hand back from near Relena's shoulder as the other girl glanced at her.
"Oh, no reason."
I don't want you Dorothy," Relena suddenly spoke up.
"Uh nani?" she asked somewhat weakly.
"I know what you're up to. Do you think that I'm stupid?"
Dorothy decided not to dignify that one with a response.
"You're an okay friend and all," the Queen of the World continued, "but I'm not interested in girls. Heero's the one for me."
Dorothy moaned and slapped her forehead with the palm of her hand. "Relena-sama, may I please be blunt?" she asked reutrning to her professional and all-too-polite manner.
"Why, of course."
"You're the biggest baka on the planet."
Relena whirled around. "EXCUSE ME?!"
Dorothy grabbed her by the shoulders and shook her hard. "He doesn't want you! He has Duo Maxwell, the fine specimen that he is, and he's satisfied. Why in the world would he trade him for anyone else?"
Relena's face fell and her groupie hurried to lessen the pain.
"What I mean is this: his heart is spoken for and neither you nor anyone else could ever change that."
"I see," Relena spoke softly. "Well let's go get my purse now."
The two girls walked a little further until they came to a fairly large clearing. While Relena rooted around in the grass for her object, the sound of engines could be heard in the distance.
"She's coming!" Dorothy gasped.
Relena popped her head up from the grass. "NANI?!"
Soon Marie had landed the plane and that was around the time Relena found her purse. She stood and glanced at the aircraft in some distaste.
"What," she wrinkled her nose. "is that thing?"
The airplane was small and only had enough room for less than 20 people. On each side, in faded black letters, was the name "Hope".
"My plane missy!" Marie jumped down and walked over to her. "Is there a problem?"
"Hai! There's no champagne or caviar! I demand an explanation!"
Marie snorted. "Listen rich girl, my plane is fine! Now, if you don't want my help just say so."
Relena raised her head high and crossed her arms across her chest. "Maybe I don't. You're rude and a peasant besides."
"Relena-sama, I don't think that this is the wisest course of action..."
"Quiet! I know what I'm doing!"
"I'm leaving," Marie got back into her airplane. "You can just find another way from this island. Adios. And see you in Hell," she added at the last moment.
"Only if you get there first!"
The plane's engines roared to life as she slowly taxied across the ground and took to the air.
"You'll make it off somehow," Marie shouted to them. "Just not any time soon!" She cackled until she was out of hearing range.
"Iie!" Dorothy shouted after her. "Come back! Please?"
The five pilots crashed into the clearing at that exact moment.
"What happened? Did she come?" Quatre asked, panting.
"Hai," the plantinum blond answered. "Relena-sama told her off. Marie got mad and left."
There was shocked silence for a moment until it was broken by several angry voices.
"KISAMA!" Wufei.
"OMAE O KOROSU!" This was from you know who.
"YOU BAKA!" Duo's addition to the outrage.
"..." Guess who that was from.
Quatre didn't say anything. But his eyes were taking on a deadly gleam. Trowa recognized it immediately and moved away.
"Uh guys," he said hesitantly. "Quatre's going ZERO."
That alerted everyone and they all took cover.
"He's gonna blow!" Duo shouted as he dragged Heero behind a large boulder, Wufei dove behind a palm tree and Dorothy ran a little ways back where they had come from.
"Quatre... Little One," Trowa said soothingly trying to calm him. "It's okay..."
"No it's not Trowa," he said eerily calm. "She must die. That is the only way for outerspace to be safe."
The others sweatdropped slightly as he spoke.
"Is anyone else seeing deja vu here?" Duo whispered before Heero yanked his braid.
"But Little One..."
"NO!" he pulled a machine gun from out of nowhere (or perhaps he was just borrowing Heero's spandex space) and pointed it at Relena. "DIE YOU BITCH!!"
"HEEROOOOO~OOOOO!" she screamed.
What will happen next? Will I put Relena out her her (and everyone elses) misery? Will Quatre regain his sanity? Will Duo finally get some? Stay tuned to the next not-so-humorous episode of Duo Maxwell's Island!
Footnote:
[1] - I can't remember what "Mission Accepted" is in
Japanese. I can only get the ninmu. (I know that it's either
Ryoukai or Kanyrou. Someone please inform me!)